Different types of sex & sexual acts: Oral, anal defined

This article is also available in Spanish.

What is sex?

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines sex as ‘a sexually motivated phenomena or behavior’. That’s a pretty broad definition when you think about it — and it’s a little different from the definition of sexual intercourse, which is more specifically about penetration (something many people automatically associate with sex). With this looser definition of sex in mind, let’s take a look at some of the types of sexual acts.

1. Vaginal sex

This type of sex involves putting a penis, fingers, or sometimes other objects like sex toys into the vagina. Many minds might go straight to this type of intercourse when we talk about sex. And while it’s not the only type of sex out there, it’s important you understand what vaginal sex involves. This is the only type of sex that requires individuals to use birth control if they want to avoid pregnancy. As with oral and anal sex, using condoms during vaginal sex is also useful for preventing the spread of STIs. You also need to make sure you clean anything that has been used for anal penetration before they go into the vagina.

Interestingly, only about 18% of female orgasms come from vaginal intercourse. The clitoris is the real pleasure center when it comes to female orgasms. Since there is some distance between the clitoris and the vaginal opening, it may make it difficult for some to climax during this type of sex. However, vaginal intercourse can still be enjoyable with or without reaching climax, or it can be practiced with clitoral (or other) stimulation if that’s what works for you.

2. Oral sex

Oral sex involves using the mouth to stimulate the genitals and other areas that people may find arousing, such as nipples. Some people might like giving oral sex but don’t like receiving it, or the other way around. There is no right or wrong way to feel about oral sex.

Clear communication with your partner can help you understand what you are both comfortable with when it comes to oral pleasure. While you can’t get pregnant from oral sex, using a condom can help prevent the spread of sexually transmitted infections (STIs).

3. Anal sex

Anal sex involves penetrating the anus with a penis, toys, or fingers. Regardless of gender, sex, or sexual orientation, this type of sex can be enjoyed by anyone. But that also doesn’t mean it’s for everyone. As with all kinds of sexual activity, it’s really important to talk about what you are and aren’t comfortable doing. 

You need to use lubricants when having anal sex because the anus doesn’t naturally create its own lubrication, and this can make sex painful if you’re not prepared. While it’s not possible to get pregnant from anal sex, it is possible to get pregnant if ejaculate gets into the vagina. You can also use a condom to protect against STIs.

4. Masturbation

Did you know that solo sex is still sex? You don’t need anyone else to be present to validate your own sexual experience. It can also be a useful way to discover your own preferences in a safe space without fear of being judged, and we can’t stress enough that you should never feel ashamed of masturbation. 

Whether you’re single or in a relationship, masturbation can be a healthy part of anyone’s sex life. If you’re comfortable with sharing the experience with your partner, masturbation can also help you teach each other what you most enjoy, and can ultimately be a healthy part of a shared sex life. Remember, it’s also fine if you want to keep it just for you.

5. Fingering and handjobs

This type of sex involves using your hands to give sexual pleasure. It could involve rubbing the clitoris or penis, or touching the testicles, or putting fingers inside the vagina or anus. 

This can be a useful way to explore what feels good, it’s also a type of sex that doesn’t lead to pregnancy (just make sure you wash your hands if you get semen on them before putting them near the vagina). 

6. Outercourse

Who says you have to take your clothes off to have fun? Sometimes called frottage, or dry humping, outercourse simply involves rubbing your erogenous areas together through clothing. Outercourse may sometimes also involve kissing or more intimate touching, but typically (as the name suggests) doesn’t involve any penetration.

Frottage is a safe way to see what feels good and can help you build trust and enjoy being intimate with your partner without getting fully naked.

7. Erogenous touching

Different sensations may feel good or bad depending on your own preferences and how you like your body to be touched. Certain areas, such as ears, the small of the back, and the neck, can all heighten arousal when touched — depending on what you find erotic. 

Whether it’s part of foreplay or not, erogenous touching is a great way to get to know your body better and discover what feels good.

8. Using sex toys

Sex toys come in many different forms, including vibrators, dildos, penis rings, and anal beads. There are many reasons people choose to use sex toys. Whether it's purely for pleasure, to help with gender dysphoria, or to aid sexual dysfunction. Some people may use sex toys regularly, while others may use them rarely or not at all. Sex toys can be a healthy addition to anyone’s sex life as long as they are used safely.

Keep your intimate objects clean to avoid infections — in some cases, you can also use condoms for added protection. Using lubricants with sex toys may make the experience more enjoyable, and is necessary if you’re using these for anal pleasure. Sex toys can be enjoyed on your own, or with company, depending on how you want to use them.

9. Phone sex

It’s easy to get hung up on being physical, but you don’t need to be in the same room or even the same city to have sex. Whether it’s a bit of breathy aural foreplay, a virile video call, or simply some steamy sexting — phone sex isn’t just reserved for those in long-distance relationships or even those who want to practice social distancing (but it is useful).

Phone sex can also create a safe space to explore untapped fantasies, while getting dirty down the line can be a great way to strengthen communication and build trust without being physically intimate.

10. Roleplay

Talking about fantasies, we’re adding roleplay to this list. Whether it's paired with physical intimacy or not, stepping out of yourself and playing with different characters or scenarios can help you learn more about your own sexuality and can build an emotional connection with your partner or partners. 

It’s common to experiment with power in roleplay, and you may also use props or toys to enact this. Roleplay can be a part of BDSM or fetish, such as one partner taking a dominant or submissive role during sex. (Keep in mind that, as with all types of sex, clear communication is really important. While it’s a good idea to discuss what you like before and after sex, you should also know that you can stop sex at any time while it’s happening if you are not enjoying it.

Some other types of sex

Now we’ve taken a look at some of the common types of sexual acts, let’s take a wider look at some other types of sex and the perks and downsides of these. 

11. Morning sex 

If you’re an early riser, then morning sex can be a great way to start the day. Levels of the male sex hormone progesterone actually peak in the morning, which is why many people with penises wake up with erections. 

12. Late-night sex 

If you prefer to snooze in the morning or if intimacy is tricky in a busy household, then sex before bed may be your preferred way to get your rocks off. Orgasms have also been shown to help improve sleep which is another great argument for sex at this time of the day. Keep in mind that drunk people can’t give consent, so late-night hookups after lots of alcohol are something to avoid. 

13. Breakup sex

The end of a relationship can be complicated, especially if you’re still attracted to that person. While one last hookup may seem like a good idea, it won’t necessarily help with closure. Setting boundaries and communicating your needs clearly can make it easier to navigate a breakup.

14. Makeup sex

We’ve all seen it in the movies: that steamy reunion that shows the spark never died. While getting back between the sheets when you’ve rekindled your relationship may be top of the list, there are good arguments for taking things slowly too. Rebuilding trust and finding a new way to be together can take time. 

15. Rebound sex

Whether you’re bouncing back from a bad breakup or just looking for casual fun, getting together with someone new can have benefits and drawbacks. There’s nothing wrong with having sex with no strings attached, as long as you are clear about this and it's not going to cause you distress. Some people may prefer to wait until they are in another relationship before they are intimate again; there’s no right or wrong way to do things.

When it comes to sex, whether it’s the timing or the type of sex you’re having, what’s most important is that it works for you and your partner. Everyone is different, and your preferences and priorities may change throughout your life. 

Get to know your body & sex life better

Thanks for checking out our list of 15 types of sex! Of course, this post only scratches the surface, and there are plenty more ways to explore pleasure out there. Promoting knowledge around sexual health is an important part of our mission here at Natural Cycles, and while we’re primarily a birth control method, we believe an inclusive approach to how we talk about sex benefits everyone. 

Natural Cycles is only available for users aged 18+ and does not protect against STIs. Find out if it could work for you today.